Indie Thoughts

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always held a strong independence about myself. Sometimes to the detriment of others around me.

I recall distinctly when as a young skater punk wearing denim jackets with band patches sewn all over them (think Metallica, Anthrax, Suicidal Tendencies and more) and I had a girlfriend who had a hard time with it. She was a little embarrassed when she said “everyone’s gonna talk about you.” My reply? “Great! At least they’ll be thinking about me!” I didn’t care what they thought, just that they thought of me. Owning a small slice of space in their minds for free was awesome.

FreeNow, I didn’t go out of my way to be different, I was just being myself. If that meant denim jackets with patches, then that’s what it was. I didn’t care what anyone thought of me. I knew myself. I knew what I liked and didn’t like. I did things my way how I saw fit.

That doesn’t mean I always did the right thing. Just ask my mom or my wife about the crazy haircut I had. (If you go through my posts from August you’ll see a picture of me in a yellow shirt. That’s the haircut I clung to). I wanted to try something different and I let the style linger through my senior year in high school. Not my finest moment but then again, I did things my way. At the time I could care less what anyone thought of it. Looking at it now I can laugh, but you know, I don’t regret it. How many times do we want to try something but don’t because we let fear rule us?

My tendency to do my own thing leads me away from a lot of things too. If some book or movie or band is the newest thing, I purposely stay away from it. Call it my old punk rock spirit. Call it being non-conformist. Call it whatever, but that’s kinda my reaction to things. I still haven’t read the Harry Potter books, mostly because “everyone loved them” and my natural tendency is to steer clear of super-popular things. I’ve never watched Dr. Who because it’s expected of scifi fans. I know, it doesn’t make sense, but it is who I am.

The indie spirit, so prevalent in the music I listened to (and still do!) is alive and well within me. I’m myself. I make no apologies about it.


5 thoughts on “Indie Thoughts

  1. I was very much the same in high school. I didn’t adhere to ANY of the trends. I was just me, dressing in black nearly every day, wearing my black fingernail polish and eyeliner, my nose buried in a book and listening to hard rock. Goth, before Goth was a thing. I had two friends that were really into the Punk scene, but I wasn’t punk, either. Years later at a HS reunion, a classmate who I never really associated with much back in the day, came up to me. She was super popular in school, a cheerleader, the whole nine yards. She told me how much she’d admired me in school and the fact that I DIDN’T follow what was popular and how I was just myself doing my own thing. I was stunned. It was something she’d just never been able to do and she thought it was so cool that I didn’t care what others thought. I was just me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow, that’s awesome how she recognized your self-confidence and ability to “buck the trends.” As we grow older, I think we have the ability to break from those social constraints we often feel in high school. Some, like you and I, might be more apt to do so while we were younger, but it’s still nice to see others come around and recognize us for who we are.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. What’s interesting, and frustrating, is that I am actually a very shy and introverted person and extremely self-conscious. But, when it comes to being myself, I’m fine (or was fine) with not dressing or acting ‘the norm’. It’s very weird.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I love Doctor Who, not because it’s popular, but because it was a British TV that my sister told us about after her first year at college back in 1974. So I’ve liked it before it was popular with the new Who episodes.
    I relate to not fitting in. Though, I can’t say it was self-confidence that made me like that. One time in high school, I wanted to wear a bow tie to school, but couldn’t find one. Instead, I found a green sponge and tied it in place. I went the whole day like that, proudly. I got strange looks, but it was who I was. I just wish I had a photo of that to show others.

    Liked by 1 person

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